By Kay Newton
The end of December is here. The native American Indians have a saying, “Today is a good day to die”. As 2020 will be the start of a new decade, it is a good time to look at what has happened over the past 10 years and what you want to achieve in the next. This allows you to think about the goals you have in mind and how you will create them before it is too late. Here are two ways you can make the most out of life: keeping a self-development journal, and making an end-of-life plan.
Lyndelle Palmer-Clarke is the creator and author of the Daily Greatness series. She is a recovering self-help junkie who’s read all the books, been to all the seminars, listened to all the DVD’s and followed all the gurus. Then Lyndelle realised, after hitting a major life crisis, that something was seriously missing from the picture: applied knowledge.
Lyndelle began her career as a singer, songwriter, actress and TV presenter in Australia. At age 18, she was the lead singer and manager of a band. At 21, she signed to a major record label, and in 2006 she was a finalist on Australian Idol. Lyndelle has also featured in numerous TV commercials, TV series and films.
After moving to London to pursue her career in music, Lyndelle experienced what some would call a breakdown but she chooses to call it her “breakthrough”, which became her catalyst for leaving the entertainment industry to follow her newfound purpose. She made it her mission to bridge the gap between knowledge and action for others seeking to live consciously.
“There are more than a few self-help junkies out there who seem to think the answers they seek are always in the next book, only to realise after reading hundreds of them that nothing has changed. The billion-dollar self-help industry, while it has good intentions, is creating nothing more than addicts; slaves to a new religion called self-help,” she says.
Lyndelle believes that if a person applies only one new idea, consistently, to their life from all the books they’ve read, their results would be astounding. “I’m not opposed to learning, but at some point, we need to recognise that we have all the answers we need to change our lives for the better. People don’t need another self-help book. They just need to apply what they already know,” she points out.
Lyndelle has made it her life mission to empower people to apply all those self-help ideas into their lives in a fun, practical way so they can start seeing results. “No more wishful thinking, no more reaching for the next self-help book, just a commitment to being your own guru, following your inspiration and living the life of your dreams,” she says.
Lyndelle is now the author of three practical journals assisting people to create their life vision, take action, and apply to their lives what they already know. Her Rocking Fit Program is a holistic online training program designed to transform your being in 12 weeks. Lyndelle, who currently lives with her fiancé in Sweden, says, “My message is simple: be your own guru.”
Jane Duncan Rogers
If we follow the Native American saying, “Today is a good day to die”, it is important to talk about the subject. Yet, many people fail to do so. Essentially we will all die, and the body will need to be disposed of. The things you have surrounded yourselves with during your life will need to be dealt with too, including your online presence. Being prepared for death is not just a Western issue, or meant for a certain age. Everyone can benefit from planning, making living easier.
In 2011, Jane Duncan Rogers’ husband died of stomach cancer and then in 2018 within the space of just one week, both her mum and dad had died. “When my husband died, I wrote about it as a way of processing what had happened to me. It took me over two years to write my first book Gifted By Grief and it was full of spiritual awakening. Yet, most people contacted me about the chapter where I had spoken to my husband and asked him questions that needed answering before he died. Those questions became the basis of my nonprofit organisation Before I Go Solutions, another book Before I Go, an online course, and certified training in end-of-life facilitation,” she shares.
Many people are challenged to think about death during life. People don’t want to think about the possibility of being in a vegetative state, for example, yet, if you do not have the legal documents in place, the regulations of the country you live in will come into play, whether you like them or not.
Says Jane, “We assume that it is normal for those left behind to deal with everything and make all the decisions. It does not have to be that way. If it is important for you to be part of the decision process and to support your family as they grieve, then an end-of-life plan is for you.”
“When my parents died,” she goes on, “it was not so much of a shock about my dad who had been ill, but it was a shock about my mum. If there was any good in this, it was that both my parents had been good students of mine and done their end-of-life plan. I had really underestimated how important this was when grieving, not just practically; I felt so much comfort knowing that we were following their wishes.”
There is often a sense of relief when the discussion is out in the open. And a great time to have this type of conversation is when all the family are congregated together. “It may sound weird but Christmas or New Year may be the perfect time to begin the ‘Before I Go’ conversation when families naturally gather together. Build up your courage and be prepared in advance. You will probably be surprised to see that they are actually ready to chat too.”
Kay Newton is an award-winning speaker, writer and midlife strategist. Follow her on KayNewton.com.
Lead image: Priscilla du Preez / Unsplash. First published in eShe’s December 2019 issue