What Google tells us about the Indian marriage

We Googled random terms related to marriage and came up with some rather surprising results. It appears Indian husbands are boring, wives are not entitled to maintenance, mothers-in-law hate you, fathers-in-law are rather more perverse, and marriage in general is a crazy thing.

Here are our results at 14:40 in New Delhi on September 10, 2014. (If you didn’t know it already, Google uses the most-used terms in real searches as auto-suggests for later ones. So these are real search phrases keyed in by lots of real people, not something Google or anyone has made up.)

ON HUSBANDS:

Indian husbands go anywhere from being ‘best friends’ (awww, how sweet) to being sick, not supportive, impotent, gay, boring, loveless, and of course they’re having lots of affairs.

husband is is my husband my husband isON WIVES:

On the other hand, Indian wives are gangsters or high-school girls (okay that just shows Indian men watch a lot of Korean or anime flicks), unfaithful, taller than the husband (now isn’t that just traumatic?), emotionally abusive and even narcissist. No wonder lots of husbands seem worried about maintenance, divorce and pension.

is my wife my wife is wife isON THE INLAWS:

Now Indian inlaws are a mean, perverted, sick bunch of people for sure, all out to maim, ruin and destroy decent Indian marriages. We’re not saying this, have a look at the results. Check out the father-in-law who wants his bahu to breastfeed him!

inlaws are

my inlaws are

brother in law

father in law sis in law mother in lawON MARRIAGE:

Indian marriage of course is a crazy thing. It’s undoubtedly a social trap and a private affair, but we’ll take hope in the fact that many agree it’s also beautiful and made in heaven.

marriage is